{"id":3274,"date":"2019-08-20T09:37:57","date_gmt":"2019-08-20T08:37:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.natashabray.com\/web\/?p=3274"},"modified":"2022-01-29T16:24:38","modified_gmt":"2022-01-29T16:24:38","slug":"fear-of-rejection-how-to-overcome-the-need-to-belong","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.natashabray.com\/web\/2019\/08\/20\/fear-of-rejection-how-to-overcome-the-need-to-belong\/","title":{"rendered":"Fear of rejection &#8211; how to overcome the need to belong"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We\u2019re all hardwired with a need to belong, to be accepted by our peers. This fear of rejection makes us fear being alone and isolated, afraid of not being accepted. Ultimately, it plays on the very deepest of our fears &#8211; that we\u2019re unworthy and unlovable.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Fear of rejection is one of the most powerful of fears and it can have a far-reaching impact on our life. If we feel we\u2019ve been rejected, we grieve. We feel the failure, pain, anger and upset associated with that rejection. And this can impact on the rest of our life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Often, a fear of rejection stems from our childhood. Our parents, in particular, may have led us to believe we weren\u2019t loved unconditionally. This could be as a result of childhood trauma, bad parenting, or even our childhood recollection of what a particular event meant. No matter what the cause, we believed (or felt) that our parents didn\u2019t love us unconditionally &#8211; and this is carried with us through to our adult life.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How fear of rejection manifests<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That belief you were unworthy and unlovable grew into a fear of rejection &#8211; and this can manifest in different ways. In our adult life, it can impact on our relationships with others. It can lead to us avoiding dating or totally committing to one partner, as we feel insecure and nervous. There\u2019s often an inability to adequately communicate our needs to others, so we take on too much and find it impossible to say no. This can lead us into an incredibly lonely and frustrating place.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At work, it manifests as procrastination, forgetfulness, self-sabotage and an inability to reach our full potential. We hold ourselves back from achieving our goals, as we fear people will reject who we may become as a result. We worry that in bettering our situation, other people will have an opinion on how we\u2019re progressing and\/or achieving.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sales calls, being visible on social media platforms, promoting our products and services, even deciding on our pricing, are all things that can be affected.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It all leads us to often act in an inauthentic way. We look to play a part, so we can hide the real us, deep inside. And we hang onto whatever circumstance or situation that makes us feel safe. We never reach beyond those boundaries as we don\u2019t want to put ourselves out there.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to overcome that fear of rejection<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Through combining therapy work with other psychological theories, my own unique concepts and my background in social work, I\u2019ve discovered a powerful way to repair damage caused by this fear of rejection.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And, although these methods can quickly help my clients, I also appreciate that there are people reading this who aren\u2019t clients and would like to explore solutions for themselves! So here\u2019s a quick breakdown of how you can start overcoming that fear of rejection.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Process those feelings &#8211; heal the original trauma or pain<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Talk it over with a sympathetic and gentle therapist. Fear of rejection often stems from childhood, so it\u2019s important that you heal that core trauma. So much of our childhoods were spent believing we needed to be or act a certain way to be loved. It\u2019s time to get that all out and heard by someone who can help. Only then, can you work on changing the belief and moving your life forward.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Develop a success mindset<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A positive and success mindset is just one important stage of my work. By instilling a belief that you are worthy of love, money and success, you\u2019re rewiring your brain to look for evidence to support this new belief.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Practice self-love\u00a0<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The belief \u2018I am enough\u2019 is absolutely essential to rapidly accelerate success your results. It\u2019s the number one most common thing I work on with all my clients. Most of our fears and beliefs stem from a belief that we are not enough in some way. It\u2019s time to change that for the better.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Believe in unconditional love<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The mantra \u2018I am loved\u2019 is powerful. To feel and believe that you are loved, unconditionally is key to your success. It\u2019s not enough to believe you are enough, you have to believe that you are unconditionally loved too. You came from the Universe, through your parents &#8211; if you can\u2019t believe your parents loved you unconditionally, believe that your source of origin &#8211; the Universe &#8211; loves and supports you unconditionally, no matter what.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Focus on what you want<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So much of our adult life is based on what others wanted us to do. Out of our fear of rejection and a deep need to feel loved, we often live a life that doesn\u2019t match our needs and desires. Living empty lives in jobs our parents wanted us to do or that we thought would make others proud and happy, never living for ourselves.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Start to focus on what you want. Turn those fears and worries you have into positives. You fear that you\u2019ll be rejected &#8211; turn it into a positive desire to make friends. You can then add an action step to this and turn it into an intention and goal.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We are all hardwired with a need to belong. But by using the tips above, you\u2019ll address any hidden fears of rejection you may have, that prevent you from moving forward from those fears. You\u2019ll learn to understand that it\u2019s ok to not have everyone on your side and in your corner. As long as you have the belief that you are loved and enough &#8211; you\u2019ll have everything you need, to overcome anything you come up against as a result.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Find out more\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.natashabray.com\/web\/about\/\">about me<\/a>, how we can\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.natashabray.com\/web\/work-with-me\/\">work together<\/a>, or take the\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.natashabray.com\/web\/success-saboteur-archetype\/\">success saboteur archetype quiz<\/a>\u00a0to find out what is blocking your next level of success.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We\u2019re all hardwired with a need to belong, to be accepted by our peers. This fear of rejection makes us fear being alone and isolated, afraid of not being accepted. Ultimately, it plays on the very deepest of our fears &#8211; that we\u2019re unworthy and unlovable. Fear of rejection is one of the most powerful&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3277,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"content-type":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3274","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Fear of rejection - how to overcome the need to belong<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"How to overcome that fear of rejection. 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